Dynamite (Win the Fight)

We came to learn, learn, learn, learn

But we fell hard and we got burned, burned, burned, burned

We’re tryin’ to finish all this excess work, work, work, work

Now give us some space for all these nerds, nerds, nerds, nerds

And the stress goes on and on and on

And it goes on and on and on

Yeah!

I slam my head down on my desk sometimes

Saying oh, no, this is stressful

I want to celebrate and live my life

But I can’t, no, not with SOAPSTones

‘Cause we gon’ rock this class

We gon’ work all night

We gon’ ace that essay

We gon’ win this fight

‘Cause she told us once

Now she’s told us twice

We can write the essays

Like they’re dynamite

We have learned it all like

We can be the last ones standing

We’re not alone at all like

We’re gonna be the last ones standing

‘Cause I, I, I believe it

And I, I, I

I just want some stickers, I just want some stickers

I’m gonna put my pen to my page

Put my pen to my page

Put your pens in the air

I slam my head down on me desk sometimes

Saying oh, no, this is stressful

I want to celebrate and live my life

But I can’t, no, not with SOAPSTones

‘Cause we gon’ rock this class

We gon’ work all night

We gon’ ace that essay

We gon’ win this fight

‘Cause she told us once

Now she’s told us twice

We can write the essays

Like they’re dynamite

Dear Journal...

Dear Journal,

                As you have been hearing about continuously for the past few months, the school year is almost over. In the waning hours that remain of my high school education, I would like to take a moment to write a farewell entry to my fellow AP English classmates.

Looking back over the years, I am all too aware of the various trials and tribulations of AP English. These trials were demanding feats requiring an insurmountable amount of hard work and dedication. I remember staying up until 5:30 am the night that the first data sheet was due. Crying. And ultimately regretting my decision to continue with AP English. Other moments of such despair were caused by memorizing quotes, writing the Amsterdam essay, having the killers and Truman Capote from In Cold Blood get into my head, and having to face my ever daunting fear of public speaking.

However, the bad parts of AP English only made the good parts even better.  After all the hard work that we put into the class, the humorous moments woven into our every day banter makes the class much more worthwhile. Proposing that we huddle under our desks for seven years like Harriet Jacobs, playing the human knot game, winning multiple choice games, winning CANDY, going on field trips, reading about plums, hearing about Ms. Serensky’s life, winning CANDY, laughing at the hilarity of people’s incompetence, Ms. Serensky’s jokes, and winning CANDY, made all the trials of AP English worthwhile.

Ultimately, I would not like to dwell on this high school experience, but rather use it order to embrace and conquer the future with more intelligence, poise, and ferocity. Thank you AP English for making me a much more intelligent, well-rounded person. It’s been real.

Until next time trusty journal,

                                 Nicola Zollinger

Top Ten Reasons to Take AP English

1. You have the opportunity to collect really cool stickers. It may not sound cool now, but trust me, nothing could be cooler.

2. You get to read exciting books like Incidents in the Life of a Slave Girl. Such engaging novels will help you appreciate all different styles of literature.

3. You will have the opportunity to beat the next Dream Team in multiple choice. Nothing is more satisfying than getting a perfect group score while the Dream Team falters behind.

4. You get to play the human know game more than once in class. Holding hands with Ms. Serensky and the Dream Team will be an experience I will never forget.

5. You will go on field trips to see Shakespearean plays. Being exposed to new environments outside of school will definitely give you some new perspectives.

6. You get to compose twenty page data sheets. Nothing is more exciting than pulling an all-nighter in order to climb this mountain! Just appreciate SOAPSTones when you have the chance.

7. You can win candy! The day our team won huge bags of candy was my favorite day in AP English!

8. You may have the opportunity to faceoff the National Merit Scholarship Finalist in a one minute debate. Now I know this may sound fun, but it was no fun-and-games.

9. You may get points off for spelling your name wrong. Yes, I know my name is “Nicola Zollinger,” not “Nicola Zolling.”

10. You will learn so much and become an incredible writer! The progress you make in these two years will be truly incredible! It may seem daunting, but it is doable!

Not So Critical Criticism

Algernon: “Dear me, you are smart!” (Wilde 8)

Rodney: “I don’t know what that means” (Currie 131)

Algernon: “Well, one must be serious about something, if one wants to have any amusement in life” (Wilde 40)

Desdemona: “If you say so” (Shakespeare 5.2. 35)

Rodney: “Please stop trying to confuse me” (Currie 131)

Algernon: “Literary criticism is not your forte” (Wilde 6)

Desdemona: “Alas, she has no speech” (Shakespeare 2.1. 103)

Algernon: “Oh! It is absurd…more than half of modern culture depends on what one shouldn’t read” (Wilde 4)

Rodney: “Listen I don’t want to be rude. I know you’re doing your job and you’re very good at it…But still I want you to be careful what you say” (Currie 131)

Algernon: “Oh! There is no use speculating on that subject” (Wilde 3)

Desdemona: “Oh heavy ignorance” (Shakespeare 2.1. 141)

Algernon: “Girls don’t think it right” (Wilde 3)

Rodney: “Maybe you wouldn’t say it that way, but that’s what you would think” (136)

Desdemona: “Be as your fancies teach you” (Shakespeare 3.3. 88)

Algernon: “Well, that is exactly what dentists always do” (Wilde 5)